Five Things You Need to Know About Your Boys & Internet Porn
in“I don’t know who else to talk to. My little boy has been watching horrible stuff. I don’t know what to do.”
There are five things we wish all parents knew about internet porn. If they did, there would probably be a lot fewer of these heartbreaking messages for us to answer!
(Note, this post contains affiliate links which support our ministry, but we only link to things we wholeheartedly recommend!)
1. Your kids will probably be exposed to internet porn at some point. Very few aren’t: only about 3% of boys and 17% of girls are never exposed to porn. So, how can that be? With kids with smartphones and Kindles, it only takes a few seconds with cousins or friends to introduce your child to porn – and nobody went close to a “computer.” You’ve got to prepare them to fight it.
2. It’ll probably happen sooner than you think. The average age of first exposure is 12 years old. That means half of kids who’ve seen porn encountered it before they were 12. If you wait until their voice changes to talk to them, you may be too late. You’ve got to start young.
3. This isn’t the porn of your youth. It’s much, much worse. This shocked us, but 83% of boys have seen group sex online, 69% have seen same-sex intercourse, 39% have seen bondage, and 32% have seen bestiality. Folks, this stuff is vile. Your boys need your help!
4. Talking about sexuality in a Biblical context will not destroy your children’s innocence. Moms tell us they are afraid to talk with their kids “too soon” about sexuality, but in this world, the risk is much higher that your children will be exposed to sexuality in a very damaging way if you don’t start early. Be age appropriate. Watch them carefully to be sure you share enough and not too much, but always make certain they know that God created sex for marriage before the enemy teaches them otherwise.
5. Your boys need your protection. They need to know that God expects them to stay pure. They need to know about the dangers of indulging in this stuff. They need to know about repentance and grace if they fall. They need to know they are going to get caught. We put Covenant Eyes on every internet-capable device in our home. That way they know if they’re tempted that Mom will know if they went there by Thursday when she gets the report. Then they’ll be busted, for sure. Sometimes Often a boy’s conscience needs that little boost.
Can a programming-savvy teen get around it? Sure, he can get around most anything, but he’s going to be caught when his hours of use don’t match the time you see him on the computer.
People tell us all the time, “We’d been meaning to get something, but we weren’t sure what was best.” Then they tell us about some horrific thing their son got into. Get some kind of internet protection now, then figure out what’s best later. (<–Tweet this.)
Try Covenant Eyes FREE for 30 days. Go ahead, try it. Covenant Eyes will support our ministry as long as you are members, but we recommended them for years before they ever offered to do that because that’s what we use ourselves. If you don’t go with Covenant Eyes, go with something, though! Protect your family.
Would you like to read five more things you need to know about boys and porn to protect your sons? We would love for you to join our community of thousands of parents raising boys to be godly men! Subscribe to our newsletter and you’ll get immediate access to a bonus article on this topic.
Even in this sin-soaked world, it is possible for young men to become honorable, godly men. They need our help, though.
For more help with how to talk to your son about these things, how to protect him from predators, or how Covenant Eyes works, head over to our Purity Guide.
Hal & Melanie